r/worldnews 9d ago Helpful 1 Silver 4 hehehehe 1 Wholesome 7

'How to Leave Russia,' 'How to Break Arm' Google Searches Spike After Putin Announced Drafting of Citizens to Fight Ukraine War Not Appropriate Subreddit

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u/Crismodin 9d ago

I think things are going to get much darker from here unfortunately.

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u/vooffle 9d ago Helpful hehehehe

I've heard Russian history summed up as "then it got worse".

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u/DeepSpaceNebulae 9d ago

There’s an old Russian proverb, “the first 300 years are the worst”

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u/JuliusWolf 9d ago

I've also heard "Life is hard but fortunately short."

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u/mr_blockchain_ 9d ago

The Belorussian president said this one. He meant to say “we live a hard life, but [on the bright side] it won’t be that way forever”, but ended up saying “we live a hard life, but [on the bright side] a short one”: “Белорусский народ будет жить плохо, но недолго.”

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u/69xX420Xx69 9d ago

Life is a birch and then you go to sleep

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u/Birion 9d ago Silver

Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. Then the worms eat you. Be grateful it happens in that order.

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u/Mateorabi 9d ago

“I the Reavers get us they will kill us, rape us, and flay our bodies. And if we’re really lucky they’ll do it in that order.”

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u/an_bal_naas 8d ago

I believe it’s “If the take the ship, they’ll rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we’re very, very lucky, they’ll do it in that order

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u/tex1088 8d ago

If you can't run, you walk, and if you can't walk, you crawl, and if you can't do that... you find someone to carry you.

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u/90s_conan 9d ago Helpful

Life's a bitch and then you die, that's why we get high, cuz you never know when you gonna go

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u/rants_unnecessarily 9d ago

... And then it got worse.

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u/SleepyxDormouse 9d ago

Isn’t there a Russian proverb that says “We thought we hit rock bottom then someone knocked from below?”

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u/biciklanto 8d ago

The one I heard recently was

Today might be worse than yesterday, but at least it's better than tomorrow.

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u/bigbutso 9d ago

In 25 years it went from "how to get blue jeans?'" to "how to break my arm?"

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u/QTsexkitten 9d ago

The bad times are over. Now for the even worse times!

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u/FrittenFritz 9d ago

"but wait, there's more"

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u/BLACKHOLESAREEYES 9d ago

Yeah and we're not even close to the crescendo

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u/Enthusar 9d ago

My wife, who is from Russia, but haven't lived there for over 10 years, would sometimes tell this story to our friends.

She and a group of her friends, as teenagers, broke another dude's leg when he was about to get drafted in the Russian army. (description of an injury) He sat down on a chair and stretched out his leg on another chair. Then they either dropped something heavy, or one of them jumped on the leg (can't remember).The fracture didn't go as planned, and it was an open fracture. Still better than going to Russian army, according to that one dude.

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u/MedicalBoardTA 9d ago

There’s a WW2 soccer movie about this where they break the goalie’s arm so the back up goalie can play. I still remember watching that scene and can’t imagine the desperation of feeling like that was the best option.

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u/Hell_Camino 9d ago

Victory!

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u/zeldastheguyright 8d ago

Escape to victory it was called in the UK

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u/slappedbygiraffe 9d ago

Victory (1981). It had Sylvester Stallone and Michael Caine in it.

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u/RatherBeYachting 9d ago

Which is based on the 1962 Hungarian movie Two Half Times in Hell which itself was inspired by the real life 1942 Death Match. German occupying forces versus a Ukrainian team in Kyiv, made up mostly of POWs who had been players for Dynamo Kyiv before the war. A story that has been exaggerated over the years, but it did happen.

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u/IlIlIlIIlMIlIIlIlIlI 9d ago edited 8d ago

similar thing can be done with the elbow. even less force needed to break if the force is applied from behind. Saw some liveleak video ages ago where one dude KOed another, and proceeded to knee into the dudes elbows from behind, broke both elbows within 10 seconds.it looked shockingly easy.

edit: im not giving advice, just saying what i saw in a video, but dont do this ull risk permanent dmg, worse than a bone break

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u/fckyourapp 9d ago

Yeah, don't do this. A broken bone will heal, a fucked up joint is going to be some degree of fucked for life.

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u/QuantumCakeIsALie 9d ago

Regular elbow dislocator here. I once dislocated it by grabbing my keys from my pocket. Had to get surgery to keep it from falling out of socket all the time.

0/10, would not recommend.

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u/ondrejkoplik 9d ago

well i guess im not using pockets anymore

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u/Marilburr 8d ago

I was gonna say the same thing but then I remembered I’m a woman and we don’t have pockets

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u/bronco_y_espasmo 8d ago

New fear unlocked, I guess. Might need someone to check your pockets for you.

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u/Erect_Chungus 9d ago

I ended up dislocating my arm 25 times last year after stupidly tripping on a pavement and landing on it funny

Edit: shoulder

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u/[deleted] 9d ago

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u/everett640 9d ago

I broke my elbow and dislocated it and after it healed for a couple of months it was entirely immobile. I was told I would never get full mobility back but I was a kid and physical therapy helped a ton.

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u/[deleted] 9d ago

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u/Accidentalpannekoek 9d ago

Physical therapist here: don't do this, it is idiotic will definitely f up your elbow for good and perhaps even give you nerve damage. Perhaps don't give advices to desperate people about things you don't know anything about.

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u/hoangfbf 9d ago

I could be wrong but I think that is messing with the ligaments, and the damage could be much worse and a torn ligaments can’t heal, versus if you break a bone it will heal easier.

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u/Time_vampire 9d ago

I can't help but laugh that the guy above you politely censored the description of the injury, and the first comment is this blunt and out in the open

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u/cunty_mcfuckshit 9d ago

Jus do what I did growing up that landed me with arthritis in both hands: stupidly punch walls as anger release.

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u/Free2Bernie 9d ago

I bet the wall also still thinks about that to this day.

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u/Arkane-Light 9d ago Helpful Wholesome

"Shortly after Russian President Vladimir Putin announced that he will deploy citizens to fight Ukraine on Wednesday, "how to break an arm at home" and "how to leave Russia" became the top trending Google searches in Russia.
The peak for searches was around 6 pm Moscow time, according to Telegram channel Mozhem Obyasnit, which first flagged the increase.
Putin announced a military mobilization of 300,000 citizens that would be drafted to fight in Ukraine."

Russians have understood that their "leader" has gone insane so they want out of his madness. Some brave ones are trying to protest but they get arrested and forced (don't wanna know how given russian police brutality) to sign the draft letters at police stations.

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u/SilentJoe1986 9d ago Silver

"So we arrested protesters against this war. What do we do with them?"

"Draft them. Im sure nothing will go wrong if we give them a firearm."

"What if they shoot their commanding officer and defect?"

"Oh please, that would never happen" (glances nervously at the camera)

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u/Jintess 9d ago

LOL that is a great point.

"Why were they arrested? "

"Protesting what Russia is doing to Ukraine"

"And you think sending them to Ukraine will accomplish..."

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u/SpaceLegolasElnor 9d ago

Well, I think they want them to disappear and if they catch a bullet it might be one true patriot saved instead.

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u/Breakfest-burrito 9d ago

Meat shields

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u/britboy4321 9d ago edited 9d ago

Yea throwing so much meat into the grinder that in theory the grinder clogs up has been the Russian style of fighting for 500 years to be brutally honest.

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u/Tristrant 9d ago

It just does not work that way anymore. Modern explosives and firearms are so sophisticated it doesn't make a difference at all. And I'm saying that as someone who heard stories about first hand experience from their grandparents about ww2

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u/ParaglidingAssFungus 9d ago

Force multipliers is the term you’re looking for, and you’re correct.

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u/Tristrant 9d ago

Thanks for that. That's indeed a term I need to remember.

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u/SYMPATHETC_GANG_LION 9d ago

Sometimes ParaglidingAssFungus is there for you when you need it.

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u/ShotPut4668 9d ago

They're fodder to set off traps and spot Ukranian positions. Russia doesn't have the ammo to fire their heavy weapons off all day. Their role is to force Ukraine to mow them down so the "important" Russians know where to aim.

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u/Jak_n_Dax 8d ago

Not quite on the same level, but it’s a little bit like WWI. Outdated armies would charge on horseback with sabers and bayonets at modern machine gun nests and just get torn apart before they even got 1/2 way there.

Modern military tech backed by the US will always beat Russia. They can only “win” if we all die from nukes.

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u/dudedormer 9d ago

Yeah they ain't getting fancy jobs that's their bomb checker their canary. The operation human sheild

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u/zeromussc 9d ago

I wouldn't be surprised at this point if the draft paper was just a pretense to have someone shot to death. If they die of gunshot wounds, who is to say, other than the state that "allowed them to serve their country", who shot the gun they were killed by?

I think that's far more likely than actually using them in the war. It is kind of hard to forcibly make these people get to the front of the army, use anywhere near modern tactics against modern firearms, and have them serve any purpose. This isn't 1911 with trenches and hoping the enemy runs out of ammunition or has a mechanical failure for the newly invented machine gun by forcing unarmed people to take hits. And the number of people you'd need to ensure control over a swell of not only unwilling but actively anti-war conscripts while fighting a losing offensive battle is likely too many for Russia that's already losing.

It's one thing to desperately conscript folks to defend something. It's another to do it to attack others. And especially a whole new level to conscript dissidents. These folks aren't fighting. They're likely being quietly whisked away under a false pretense in many cases.

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u/ReZTheGreatest 9d ago

I think I read somewhere that they risk 15 years in prison for rioting.

5 for damaging military property

10 for surrendering to the enemy.

May as well lob a grenade into their ammo dump, and fuck off over to Ukraine waving a nice white flag tbh.

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u/Lee1138 9d ago

"No comrade komissar, I was only having smoke next to ammo dump, like all the other accidents that have been highly reported on. Accidents happen. Is well known fact!"

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u/CelerySlime 9d ago

Well it’s been said before but they don’t need to give them functioning weapons or ammo to be cannon fodder.

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u/ErikkShone 9d ago

"I'm dead anyways. My beef isn't with Ukraine." This is how people get fragged.

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u/waydownsouthinoz 9d ago

When more soldiers in a unit don’t want to fight than those that do the unit becomes completely ineffective regardless of whether they have weapons or not. You get jobs not being done that are critical and shit falls apart.

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u/ScottieScrotumScum 9d ago

Officers in the rear to shoot for retreating or deadly forces if going on forward

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u/RuthlessIndecision 9d ago

He can only shoot so many until they shoot back, I suppose

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u/Masl321 9d ago

They threaten their families. Thats the way you break a human. Thats how Nazis kept people in concentration camps without rioting they did this in Dachau to 300,000 people at once (around 1943/4/5).

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u/SpaceShrimp 9d ago

Apparently, getting sent to Ukraine is seen as a punishment. Not without merit, but still.

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u/Panda_hat 9d ago

They'll draft them, force them to the front, and then not give them firearms.

Literally just using their own population as meat shields and forced labour.

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u/sometechloser 9d ago

They don't get fire arms dude. They'll start with jobs like cleaning and digging trenches and they'll end with jobs like driving a tank with no munitions into the front line so that when they blow the fuck up the russians can see which way the Ukrainians shot from.

This is the experience explained by a surrendered Russian volunteer who was told he'd never pass the second front line. He said he was in the war for 5 minutes and all his buddies died in the tanks around him and he was left for dead. He believed it was for the russians to see what direction Ukrainians were shooting from.

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u/bronco_y_espasmo 8d ago

It has always been a way of detecting the enemy.

Some people seem shocked by the brutality of war, and... come on. This is war. That´s how it goes. And Russia has done this before!

Just because we have Netflix and electric cars and drones... it doesn't mean things are going to be less cruel or something.

In the end, it is about killing, hurting, destroying other human beings by using whatever you can use.

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u/occupied_void 9d ago

In theory and principle a good idea just don't forget that a few years back Russia resurrected the Commissar officers back into the army to enforce 'correct political thought,' I'm guessing these are shoot first kinda people (but I think this may be the response from both sides so ...)

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u/Mochizuk 9d ago edited 9d ago

"Shortly after Russian President Vladimir Putin announced that he will deploy citizens to fight Ukraine on Wednesday, "how to break an arm at home" and "how to leave Russia" became the top trending Google searches in Russia.The peak for searches was around 6 pm Moscow time, according to Telegram channel Mozhem Obyasnit, which first flagged the increase.Putin announced a military mobilization of 300,000 citizens that would be drafted to fight in Ukraine."

Russians have understood that their "leader" has gone insane so they want out of his madness. Some brave ones are trying to protest but they get arrested and forced (don't wanna know how given russian police brutality) to sign the draft letters at police stations.

I feel like this kind of thing only works if your people still believe in your country or you as a leader. If the majority of your soldiers have to be forced to fight for a cause they don't respect, yet alone believe in... well, we'll see what happens.

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u/TheGuyfromRiften 9d ago

Or if the enemy is a worse fate. IIRC a big part of Soviet mobilization was the soviet citizens rightfully being scared of what the Nazis would do to them, news based on what the Nazis did to others.

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u/CRtwenty 9d ago

Ukraine has been making a lot of propaganda showing Russian POWs being treated well to try and counter this exact thing. They're encouraging Russian troops to surrender as much as possible.

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u/praguepride 9d ago

IIRC they got at least one tank when they offered a bounty for russian equipment. Also Ukraine is running out of places to hold POWs

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u/DelicateJohnson 9d ago

Yeah I can see them shooting their commanders and immediately surrendering

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u/12-idiotas 9d ago

You’re assuming they’ll be treated the same. There are non fighting roles I guess.

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u/Fast_Garlic_5639 9d ago

In that case it's a length of wire and some a Molotov cocktail

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u/12-idiotas 9d ago

I watched a documentary on the idiots joining ISIS and there was this Dutch or German dude that went there and his role was to distract and divert fire by running unarmed in the front. He died before the documentary was released. They called him or his role “the rabbit”.

Sharing this as an example on how you can have a fighting role unarmed.

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u/Impossible-Cake-1658 9d ago

I was talking to my kids (teens ) about the situation over there and they were saying" Ya I'd volunteer to surrender then switch sides. "

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u/JohnHazardWandering 9d ago

First you would have to escape your own unit without getting shot in the back and then you would have to hope that the Ukranians recognize that you're surrendering before they take a shot.

A lot could go wrong.

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u/CRtwenty 9d ago

Yeah but you're still trading near certain death for mere possible death.

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u/Dizzycactus3 9d ago

Also I doubt Ukraine would let you switch sides unless they want a lot of spies in their ranks. Your best hope would still be a POW being prosecuted for being part of the invasion and that they at least drop allegations of war crimes if you surrendered quickly after deployment

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u/PaganHerbalist 9d ago

I think the best hope would be calling that hotline Ukraine setup for Russian defectors. Better chance of survival that way

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u/DmYouMyPenis 9d ago

Just some more info here. It was secretly 1mil as their end goal. They can’t even supply 190k, I don’t know how they will arm civilians. Incoming mass desertion, which will influence the actual soldiers to do the same.

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u/Arkane-Light 9d ago

Let's hope mass desertion, insurgence and rebellion spark in the newly "recruited" army because otherwise things cannot improve, it will only get worse.

And also it will not be easy to try and stand against Putin's generals, they got the order to shoot to kill any desertors or those who try to flee.

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u/implicitpharmakoi 9d ago

it will only get worse.

The chorus to the Russian national anthem.

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u/German_Irish_chicken 9d ago

I saw a video yesterday about Napoleon calling up 300,000 citizens. didn't end to well.

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u/mrbadassmotherfucker 9d ago

Do you have a link? Would be very interested in watching this

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u/German_Irish_chicken 9d ago

here you go it's really good, also there is a Napoleons retreat from Moscow which is also very good.

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u/Mindless-Umpire7420 9d ago

Dude I love these history channels, and I’m so happy that oversimplified is finally covering conflicts in antiquity, the Roman republic during the 3-2nd century bc was so badass

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u/BeExcellentPartyOn 9d ago

The first Punic War was pretty epic just because of the the naval battles, but I can't wait for Oversimplified's videos on the second and third wars, they were absolutely bonkers and so few people know about them.

I shill it so much you'd think I was being paid for it, but Dan Carlin's series Punic Nightmares on those wars is fantastic too.

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u/5DollarHitJob 9d ago

I love Oversimplified. Their videos are (fairly) short and make history fun. I've watched quite a few of their videos but haven't seen the one above. I'll have to watch it after I drop the kids off at school.

Edit: Oh, the one above isn't Oversimplified. Oh well, I'll watch it anyway.

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u/Bear9800 9d ago

In the times of napoleon the power divide between ordinary people and the military wasn't as big as it is now.

What did they have back then? muskets? much easier to swarm than high capacity machine guns, tanks, helicopters, drones and missiles.

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u/Viking_Drummer 9d ago

After seeing what happened to the russian tanks and helicopters in Ukraine I’m not so sure about this

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u/Kaymish_ 9d ago

"If it moves draft it" Putin taking that +100% Manpower modifier like he's low.

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u/Great_Chairman_Mao 9d ago All-Seeing Upvote

Imagine being drafted to fight in an war as an aggressor in 2022… I would understand if someone was invading your country, but being drafted to go invade a neighbor is insane.

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u/Carne_Asada_Friez 9d ago

"I broke my arm falling out my window. We really need to get this window situation figured out boss."

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u/Panda_Tech_Support 9d ago

“Odd…how did you not get shot by the birds? Everyone who falls out window gets shot by birds too”

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u/snicky29 9d ago

On a serious note, I actually feel very sad for the normal citizens who never signed up for this horror. You can tell by the massive protests which erupted out there yesterday. Nobody wants to die selflessly. Not at this day & age, especially if you're a 20 year old adult. You've literally got your whole life to live ahead & have to yet experience so many things.

It was so chilling for me to see videos yesterday of people escaping the country. All this because of one maniac. I seriously hope, a tide now turns, and he gets overthrown by his own people.

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u/albl1122 9d ago

In comparison, the fight against Nazi Germany was a justified one. For one it was a defensive war. But it was VERY costly in human lives for the soviets. You'd have been better off survival chance wise in a medieval village facing the black death rather then turn 18 in the USSR in 1941

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u/EggyChickenEgg88 9d ago

They werent really massive considering Russias population. More women in Iran are currently protesting.

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u/MurderousLemur 9d ago edited 9d ago

I just met some people from Georgia, the country. They're pissed because of all the Russians running away from home are moving there and buying up real estate, causing the market to explode for actual Georgians.

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u/TokioJam 9d ago

Same with Central Asia (for 32 years they refused to pronounce the name of our country correctly even though we correct them all the time) and overall the whole world. My best friend lives in a small village in Switzerland and hears Russian language all the time, it never happened for the past 4 years she lived there.

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u/EnvironmentalAd2167 9d ago

kirgizia

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u/TheMasterofBlubb 9d ago

Heyyyy my parents are from there, if you ignore the rampant corruption and detiriorating infrastructure, its a really nice country

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u/muddybanana13 9d ago edited 9d ago

Same with Turkey. Russians mostly live and migrate to Antalya and currently there’s some housing crisis going on there. Lots of Turks can’t afford to live in the city because of that.

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u/-ANGRYjigglypuff 9d ago

Antalya

I'm on google image search and holy wow that is a pretty place

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u/KABOTECH 9d ago

Turkey has lots of cool places to visit, Antalya is probably like what 5th beautiful state

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u/Danagrams 9d ago

how to overthrow fascist dictator

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u/AmazingMojo2567 9d ago

Open a window

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u/erakis1 9d ago

I’m just imaging him being chased around his giant table to the Benny Hill theme.

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u/Racingfan76 9d ago

Thank you for putting this image in my head cause now im laughing to myself

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u/lightyearbuzz 9d ago

Look up the defenestrations of Prague (ya that's plural)

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u/RogerTreebert6299 9d ago

At this rate I need to call my bookie about some betting odds for Putin not seeing 2023

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u/Rellickz 9d ago edited 9d ago

They apparently shut down airlines leaving the country for groups of people for their draft. I couldn't imagine being forced to fight, kill and possibly die in an invasion you stand against. When it comes down to it our lives are just pawns for the higher ups, its disgusting.

Edit: Yes, I know full well the U.S. also has a draft and has used it for offensive forces. My comment still stands that giving your life for a fight you personally have no part in is awful. Thanks.

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u/Awesomethecool 9d ago

Hopefully most of them defect or desert, but not I'm not sure how easy that is without getting caught/punished. Hope they turn out okay regardless.

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u/Dafish55 9d ago

A lot of them will. Especially if Ukraine offers amnesty.

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u/[deleted] 9d ago edited 9d ago

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u/AnyoneButWe 9d ago

Let me guess: the return trip Turkey towards Moscow is free and there is no queue?

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u/Gamegear12 9d ago

And with free lodging at a Beautiful resort far far away east of Moscow

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u/Teslapromt 9d ago

Actually, not right now, but it will be. A lot of people buy return tickets with refunds so border control lets them leave. Refund them as soon as they are out.

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u/Tiks_ 9d ago

Takes a Russian teacher 20-27 months to make $13k? Damn son

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u/Khannimal 9d ago edited 9d ago

Not only a teacher but every middle-class people. 40k is kinda norm salary in every small city. Ps: just checked the price and it isn't correct at all. Not 800k but 50k roubles.

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u/Kiboune 9d ago

40k in my small town is VERY good salary

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u/guinader 9d ago

Cost of living is important, maybe 40,000 is just enough to live ok in Russia. He's pointing out how expensive the plane ticket is

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u/Teslapromt 9d ago

Not with rent. If you own a flat its ok, but if you don't, rent will put you on ramen and oats diet with a salary like this.

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u/Complex_Ad775 9d ago

I need to do both arms and legs. Bone spur just won’t cut it any more!

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u/T5-R 9d ago

Hopefully soon it will be "how to assasinate a dictator"

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u/didintneednoschol 9d ago

Lol theres a movie like that

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u/TooLostintheSauce 9d ago

He seems like he’s not ever calling this off. I wouldn’t be surprised if his last move is to use the nukes.

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u/TatodziadekPL 9d ago

He will rule this sector or see it burnt to ashes around him

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u/Default1355 9d ago

War. War is coming. With all it's horror.

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u/TrueStarsense 9d ago

Putin checks a lot of same boxes that Mengsk did.

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u/Jintess 9d ago

He's the mad king at this point.

Russia needs a Kingslayer

(or dragons. Dragons would work)

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u/Pale-Effort9289 9d ago

The nukes are the dragons and he has a ton of them

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u/Jintess 9d ago

Kingslayer it is, then!

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u/Frozty23 9d ago

So we need a one-armed man who can swim 2 miles without losing his breath.

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u/GreenScrapBot 9d ago

"I will not be stopped! Not by you, or the United States, or the Ukrainians or anyone! ..."

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u/poopypants513 9d ago

Mengsk did nothing wrong

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u/SilentJoe1986 9d ago

My hope is if he gives the order and people ignore him, or somebody in his inner circle shrugs then shoot him in the head. "Oh no, looks like Vlad had a sever brain aneurysm"

Would be interesting to start spreading rumors of a leak where his inner circle are talking about assassinating him behind closed doors to end the war. Ramp up his paranoia.

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u/ul2006kevinb 9d ago

Yeah there's no way he's going to launch nukes. If he looks like he's going to he's going to accidently fall out the window

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u/SilentJoe1986 9d ago

Its a surprising common cause of death these days

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u/rinanlanmo 9d ago

Defenestration is IN this winter in Moscow.

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u/pygmy 9d ago

'His brain matter fell out a window in his skull'

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u/Dangeryeezy 9d ago

But if Putin were to be removed, you don’t worry that someone even more insane would take over? Like that guy whose daughter was killed in the car bomb. I heard that he thought that Putin wasn’t pushing hard enough and being soft and that Putin was considered level-headed compared to him.

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u/UncaringNonchalance 9d ago

Not while he’s alive. Imagine being such a shit leader you have to mobilize citizens, but arrest any that talk about it.

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u/Carne_Asada_Friez 9d ago

I think he meets a very thin window before that happens

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u/Melereth 9d ago

Let's hope so.

This is my greatest fear in the moment. I think Putin is so delusional that he would do anything to keep his image as a "strong man" and as a leader.

He's so full of himself that he has lost touch with reality long time ago - or he's so egotistical and greedy that he gives a shit what happens to Russia

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u/Nwcray 9d ago

And a very thin window between that and the rest of the world stepping in. Nukes would change the game significantly, and many many countries would take issue with their use.

Not that I disagree with you, Putin probably would order their use before admitting he’s losing, just that the retaliation from that would be insane.

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u/Carne_Asada_Friez 9d ago

I'm saying his comrades would mutiny before they launch. They know they themselves are dead as soon as they press the button. Either contribute towards the apocalypse or save the world. Pretty easy choice. I hope!

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u/DocNMarty 9d ago

My worry is that Russia will use low-yield nukes (think less than Hiroshima) tactically, explain it as a "non-nuclear novel weapon" (despite it having all the hallmarks of a nuclear weapon), and the world will call them out on their BS but just give them a slap on the wrist at most.

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u/_zenith 9d ago

I’d bet that smaller than Hiroshima doesn’t actually exist anymore in their arsenal, the “suitcase” nukes were a novelty and not maintained. Way too expensive.

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u/yeetforceone 9d ago

As is this entire war.

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u/aaronhayes26 9d ago

Yeah unfortunately I very much see this as a situation where if Putin doesn’t get what he wants he intends to take everybody else to hell with him.

Hopefully the Russian military is smarter than he is.

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u/zack23483 9d ago

♫ the shits really hit the fan, by the will of a single man ♫

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u/Traditional_Sail1310 9d ago

🎶Whatchu gonna do when shit hits the fan🎶

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u/langley3000 9d ago

🎵Search “how to break arm” and leave this band🎵

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u/[deleted] 9d ago

[deleted]

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u/JunkedLotSerenade 9d ago

Would be a start but fuck knows what horrible cunt will follow in his place

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u/Ice1789 9d ago

Russian history proves the next one is rarely any more sane than the previous

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u/AlterEdward 9d ago

The troops that are already there don't want to be there. They can draft, but what's to stop them just not bothering once they're there?

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u/Illerios1 9d ago

Russian military has a long history of firing upon its own troops to boost their motivation and morale!

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u/R0cky9 9d ago

I’m surprised he hasn’t turned their internet off

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u/b1eed0ut 9d ago

this is so fucked, those teenage boys that were hanging out doing fun shit suddenly being taken away from their families and being used as chess pieces for some ego dick measuring competition. screw this guy

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u/arseholeninator 9d ago

Strange how the teenage pro Russian influencers has now gone quiet after this…

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u/CoreyLee04 9d ago

There is a video of young pro war men counter protesting then they literally get pulled to be put on a bus to be drafted. They went pro to anti within seconds once they realized they were going.

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u/be-more-daria 9d ago

It's so sad but kinda funny in a dark way.

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u/AllInHarry 9d ago

That’s just.... Poetic

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u/AT-ST 9d ago

Link?

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u/kerelberel 9d ago

Do you have any links? I wonder what kind of content those people produce.

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u/RainbowGayUnicorn 9d ago

50 years old men as well, imagine seeing your dad who is not in good health being drafted.

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u/kobresia9 9d ago

My best friends’s dad is 49 and a perfect candidate for the draft. She’s devastated, counting minutes awaiting the call.

Mine is 61, otherwise a great candidate too. Putin said there’ll be age restrictions or whatever, but the law doesn’t say anything about it.

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u/ChinoUSMC0231 9d ago
  1. Russian citizens get forced into Russian military
  2. Become veteran
  3. Mutiny
  4. Take back Russia
  5. Become part of the world again
  6. Profit.

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u/JohnHazardWandering 9d ago

Living through the war to become a veteran is the hard part.

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u/xITmasterx 9d ago

Welp, looks like Putin might have played himself again if the very soldiers he recruited decided to turn against him.

Just another problem to pile on top of his ever-increasing pain. Mutiny is coming.

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u/UltimateGammer 9d ago

Just how you get another dictator with military ties.

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u/Malkochson 9d ago Gold

Got nothing but sympathy for the majority of Russians who genuinely never wanted this war and were just trying to live their lives in peace.

However, one can't help but think that at least some of those searches were done by people who were supportive of the war, covering their vehicles with 'Z' stickers and spouting jingoistic propaganda during the initial months.

And thus, here we see the 74853th example of paper tiger nationalism: its always "fuck their shit up", "let me at 'em!" and "glory to Motherland" when its someone else doing the fighting. Screw these gopniks who stood behind Putin through every step of this farce until it became inconvenient for them to do so.

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u/Odys 9d ago

Usually it's not the elite that is going to fight, just the boy next door.

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u/SansSoeli 9d ago

Much worse - some people saw it all coming in 2010 and were actively protesting and warning all around. Best of them and now dead or in jail, but huge amount still there and it's absolute psychedelic zoo, all around is absolutely incomprehensible -

- First of all it's so obvious that on many sites half of comments are fake and fake upvoted. It's so obvious how now hidden media is trying to spread ideas like "it's our duty", "everything ok, we start training tomorrow", "good luck", "return alive" and so so on. They are so obviously fake, but shockingly, 99 of 100 people do not notice.

- And secondly, absolutely shocking for me that people bite on typical fake choice - they think between 1) obey and go conscript and 2) break arm and run away. That seriously feels like 99 of 100 had a lobotomy and option 3) "stand up and fight" was cut out of their minds. I'm afraid to be forcefully put in group of such 99 zombies soon...

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u/Iron0ne 9d ago

Honestly the most surprising thing about this is that they are still able to Google anything.

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u/JediJofis 9d ago

How to assassinate a psychotic tyranical dictator?

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u/Antoinefdu 9d ago edited 9d ago Wholesome

Little WW1 trick for you:

  • Get an empty match box.
  • Discard the tray and keep only the outer cardboard ring.
  • Bend your dominant hand's index finger tightly and place it inside the cardboard ring. It should be a tight fit, if not, try with a smaller matchbox.
  • Leave your index finger like that overnight. The longer the better.
  • The next morning, carefully remove the cardboard ring, grab the tip of your index finger and extend it as hard as you can. Normally, the tendons will snap, making you unable to use that finger for a while, and thus to shoot a rifle.

You are now in excruciating pain, but you should also be able to dodge the draft.

Individual results may vary. Testimonials may not reflect the typical user's experience, and are not intended to represent or guarantee that anyone will achieve the same or similar results. Also they might just tell you to shoot with your middle finger. In that case you can at least flip them off and ask "this one?"

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u/TerrifyinglyAlive 9d ago

I damaged (but not totally severed) the tendons in my dominant hand index finger around six or seven years ago. As far as I can judge, finger-tendon-injuries are gonna cause you pain forever. It’s not agonizing, and still better than dying in war, but the pain and stiffness are persistent, and it doesn’t seem to ever really feel healed.

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u/Small-Ad-777 9d ago

Or, since you know its russia. They just send you anyway without being able to shoot.

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u/p1um5mu991er 9d ago

Certainly something I have yet to google

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u/3woodx 9d ago

Dude, most of the soldiers don't want to fight. I read a recent article saying Russian soldiers retreating will be shot.

Not getting paid or paid what they were told. Screw this I'm going back and throw down some vodka.

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u/leeksausage 9d ago

I’m on holiday in Bodrum, Turkey right now. We’ve had an obscene influx of Russian guests in the last 24 hours. Price of the hotel has quadrupled (apparently, not validated).

The mood in the hotel complex is solemn as hell. The men are glued to their phones and the partners look miserable. I’ve seen (older) men shed subtle tears - perhaps for their sons and nephews.

Despite it being an ‘us vs them’ mentality, you absolutely can’t help but feel sorry for them all. Have contemplated inviting a select few to dinner with us.

Makes you appreciate this isn’t their war, it’s the war of a mad man looking to go down on the history books as one of the ‘greats’.

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u/thequicknessinc 9d ago

Don’t Russians use mainly use Yandex instead of Google?

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u/SpaceFox1935 9d ago

Older ones do, mostly. Folks of my age may use it for easier movie/music/software/game piracy. Google is the default search engine on mobile devices and browsers anyway, so it just kinda gives Google a good edge, I suppose

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u/thequicknessinc 9d ago

Appreciate the thorough answer. Makes a lot of sense!

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u/t0FF 9d ago

Apparently not when they care about search results.

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u/Tyrannicide31 9d ago

Russian looking at arm: “I must break you”

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u/themodestmice 9d ago

it sucks for all the people that have been against the war from the beginning but a lot of russian’s were generally apathetic. hopefully this might help turn public sentiment in russia against the war

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u/arseholeninator 9d ago

Go to Quora and it’s filled with pro Russians living in the West spouting about how Ukraine is fascist. Hope they go fight for Russia when they are called.

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u/PloppyTheSpaceship 9d ago

There but for the grace of God go I.

You, me, all of us - we are all just a couple of accidents of birth away from this being us, accidents we cannot control. For me, I'm male, born at the right time, but in a different country. If you're female, what if you were born male? What if you were born a year or two earlier, or later?

Of course there are two sides here. What if you're Ukrainian? What if your country was invaded?

I've got three children and a wife. I cannot comprehend leaving them, but I've had a few scares where they've skirted death. I cannot imagine being Russian and suddenly being pulled aside in the street to be handed draft papers, knowing I'll probably die. Or being Ukrainian and hearing that the school my eldest goes to has been bombed.

I can't imagine this. Or more rather, I can imagine it, and I desperately don't want to. I've done this before - what if my wife and youngest DID due in childbirth, as they so nearly did. My mind just goes to pretty dark places, hits a wall, and needs to get out. So maybe consider this post a new way of "getting out".

Lots of people suggest escape, which is fair enough if you can. Others feebly suggest waiting for weapons, then shoot your way out. But imagine you are taken. You've delayed things a bit. You're given a drink to calm your nerves. You begin to feel comfortable. Oh yeah, you're going to fight in Putin's war, but that's a problem for tomorrow. And tomorrow. And tomorrow.

Sooner or later you're there.

This is an atrocity. We are not property to be used against our wills, to fight because some old bastard wants land. He's got enough of it, and what does it fucking matter to him? How many thousands have died who were just getting on peacefully?

Thousands of lives so far. Versus one (at least - I accept there may be more).

Take this barbaric slaver Putin out.

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u/gentleman_bronco 9d ago

As i recall, a very prominent Russian sympathizer got out of a conscription situation with bone spurs.

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u/0n0n-o 9d ago

They should be googling "how to start a revolution"

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u/veevoir 9d ago edited 9d ago

Well, it is almost October, so the time is right.

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u/MaznikNebula 9d ago

The only thing they need to look at is what happened to the Tsars.

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